Roberto’s Going Away Party

The big card the Dreamers made for him

…crowd shot…

…crowd shot…

…crowd shot…

…crowd shot…

Opening his gifts

Looking at the photo album we gave him during the song time

‘Hora Boliviana’ means Bolivian time; it means ‘come when you want to’. I didn’t want to. They told us 3:30, on Friday. The clock on my screen said 3:50 and I was still putzing around online. I didn’t want to say goodbye. I didn’t want it to be real. So I thought procrastination would nullify the inevitable? The brain goes a little crazy when crazy love’s involved.

Crazy love says you leave your family and move across the ocean to create a new one made up of rejects and marginalized little ones.

Crazy love says you spend more time with orphans who call you Aunt than you do with your blood relatives you left behind.

Crazy love says you make ends meet, even if though you wonder if the strain of it all will break you to an irreparable pile of shattered bits.

Crazy love says to dozens of children, “Come, carve your place in my heart, even though I know at any moment you could go walking away and tear a living piece right out of me.”

Crazy love says a weepy prayer of blessing, holding on to the tiny shoulders for just a minute more, all the while hoping desperately it’s all been enough.

We went to the “party”. At least it had all the components of a party: cute plates, brightly colored drinks, sweet snacks, guests, gifts, songs, even laughter and well wishes. My heart didn’t feel like celebrating. I tried to distract myself by watching the kids play with balloons and swing around over-sized gummy worms. Amidst the commotion I would catch my breath as I saw him from the corner of my eye. I wanted to push pause, and then rewind, and delay the departure.

We gathered in a circle. Some of the Dreamers spoke out blessings over Roberto. Fernando took three turns. One of the older girls led all the children in a prayer. Then the director asked me to do a final prayer over this little boy, to finish things up.

I said yes. I didn’t want to. My husband stood next to me. We each took a hand of the boy. Seven years of care, effort, and love came rushing through my heart and over my lips as I poured out prayers of thanks to our Father. As my words turned to a request for goodness in the next part of this boys life the tears overtook the whispers and I couldn’t finish. I didn’t want to. I sobbed. My husband finished the prayer. Many hugs followed.

Roberto’s grandmother came up and shook my hand and patted my arm as she mumbled a humble acknowledgment. I followed the motions I had learned as politeness – the shake, the pat, the kiss, and the quiet words. I did it all, but I didn’t want to.

Our social worker came over to console me. She told me he would be fine. She told me the family is good. She told me this would be good for Roberto. I heard her. I didn’t want to. I agreed. I didn’t want to.

Before the emotional ending I had found a moment to talk with Roberto. I crouched down next to his seat as he munched on sweets.

“How are you? Tell me about your new house,” I said with an inviting smile.

Roberto has a calm spirit. He looked up and simply talked with me. “It’s a small place. A very small place. Just a couple rooms and a kitchen,” he said with the lisp of missing teeth.

“Are there many people there?”

“No, not many.”

“Are there animals there?” I knew he now lived on a farm. He had made the official move on Tuesday and had come back Friday for the going away party.

His eyes lit up as he quickly rambled off the list of livestock, “Kittens, pigs, hens… who lay eggs… chicks… but one of the chickens we killed.”

“To eat?” I follow up to his matter of fact information.

Another boy overheard the statement and asked in an appalled drawl, “You killed a chicken and ate it?”

Roberto smiled. The hubbub didn’t rattle him. He was at home, his second home.

Regardless of the fate of the deceased chicken, Roberto’s life looks very different now. He is with family who care for him and love him. That tie will hold him his whole life.

Even though it was hard I am glad that we were able to do this for Roberto. I want to make mention of the people who came to help send Roberto off knowing he is loved and will be missed:

The Dreamers, Roberto’s grandma, Marisol, Adela, Cristina, Liudmila, Benita, Irma, Olivia, other Tias, Limbert, Rhiannon, Anisha, other volunteers, Melinda, Romon, Jalynne, Jolee, Gabrielle, and DaRonn

If you have ever said a prayer for the Dreamers, you have prayed for Roberto – thank you. If you have ever sent along financial assistance to the House of Dreams, you have helped Roberto – thank you. If you have ever helped in a project, volunteered, or visited the home in the last seven years, then you influenced Roberto’s life – on his behalf, and with all the sincerity of my heart – thank you.

- Angie

Previous post about Roberto’s court date: http://houseofdreamsorphanage.wordpress.com/2013/05/22/robertos-court-date/

Roberto’s Court Date

This afternoon Roberto and his family, his blood relatives, are standing before a judge who has the final say. The investigations and home studies that represent months of preparation have been put in her hands. She will hear from each of the team members assigned to his case. Then she will decide.

I asked if I could take his picture in his favorite part of the house. He chose the sofa in the family room.

Roberto’s favorite place in the home.

Hugs from Estefani.

Hugs from Tia Benita.

At the door with our social worker Cristina.

A look back.

The highest priority in Bolivia for children who have been placed in institutions is that every possible effort be made for them to be united with blood relatives. For Roberto this meant six years of waiting. He is nine. He came to us when he was three. He would receive visits every once in a while from different family members. He knew this was the plan.

For the last few months the transition has begun with weekends with his family away from The House of Dreams. His new life will be different. There are other children in the home he will be in. He was quick to tell me all their names and ages. They live out in the country on a farm.

UPDATE:They had the hearing. The judge wants to see some more paperwork. Roberto will be with us for at least one more week.

- Angie

Carolina Returns for Her Birthday

Carolina was adopted a few weeks ago by a lovely family. (You can read about her adoption here). She and her family are still in Bolivia and won’t be returning home to Spain for another few weeks.

Yesterday was Carolina’s 7th birthday. She celebrated her birthday at the House of Dreams with all of the children and workers.  Carolina’s parents brought cake, snacks, drinks, games, and a piñata. The children especially loved the party favors, which were small boxes full of toys and candy.

After they were sugared up, they danced to the music playing on the radio, chased each other around,  played catch, picked up the left over confetti on the floor and threw it at each other, etc. I kept looking at Carolina, her older sister, and her family. I could not help but notice how happy they truly are. It was such a beautiful sight.

I was reminded that, as much as I enjoy spending time with the children, loving on them and teaching them, re-insertion or adoption is the ultimate goal for each Dreamer.

Please join us in praying for our Dreamers. Pray over the re-insertion/adoption process for the Dreamers.

Also, if you are interested in adoption, click here for information on how it works here in Bolivia.

- Melinda

A Dreamers Prayer

As the school aged children are studying for their final exams, the younger one’s have gained an interest in school work. So, we are beginning with learning to recognize, write and associate the letters of the alphabet, beginning with “A”.

When I introduced our work to the younger children, Fernando, a pleasant, lovely, helpful, and energetic child wanted to prove to me that he is already ahead of my curriculum. He sprung up out of his seat and ran to get his work book. Before he could, he slipped and fell on a piece of paper and hit his head on the floor. There was about 10 seconds of silence before he decided it hurt enough to cry. This time he had a legitimate reason to cry, so I couldn’t just hush him, or tickle him to happiness as usual.

So….what’s the solution?  The rest of the children and I decided to pray for him as I held him in my lap and rubbed his head. Suddenly, his cry became more intense. I thought, “This isn’t a good idea. I am nurturing his crying.” Just as I finished the thought, Fernando began to blurt out his prayer requests.

#1: Pray that my mom and dad come to get me.

#2. Pray that my brother comes with them, soon.

Fernando forgot all about his physical pain and I realized maybe this cry is an emotional one. Maybe he misses his family. As we prayed, his hysterical crying ended. By the time we said “Amen” he was all better, all smiles. Fernando, with excitement, shared with us the names of his family members. Then, we returned to our lesson for the day, the letter “A”.

 

Fernando being helpful, as always.

 

Please keep Fernando’s requests in your prayers. Also pray for our Dreamers and their families. Pray that families be reunited and/or that the adoption processes go quickly and smoothly.

John 14:13-14 ”Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it!”

- Melinda

Tears of Joy

Yesterday two of the little dreamers in The House of Dreams Orphanage Marta and Melisa went back to be with their mother and it brought back mixed emotions. I say mixed emotions because on the outside I find myself being happy that their mother fulfilled all of the requirements of the government to be reunited with her children but at the same time there’s a tear in my eye because chances are this will be the last time I will see these two precious little lives.

Of course this is not the first time this situation has happened. The first time was the hardest. It happened without warning. We simply received a phone call that Brandon and Abigail were leaving. Two hours later, their parents were at the orphanage picking them up. The longer the child is with us the harder the home going can become. For example with the first few the orphanage was only a few months old so it was not so hard to disconnect but over the years when a child has been with us for months or even years it is more difficult to disconnect.

The best way I can explain it is referring to the situation as “tears of joy”. Tears  usually take place during sad times. When a loved one is lost or something unfortunate happens. I have noticed when a Dreamer leaves our care there is a mixture of both joy and sadness, comfort and pain, tears of joy and tears of sadness. In the last 4 years I have tried several strategies to cope and still not found the formula so that the experience does not break my heart in the process. But as I think about it maybe that is the way it is suppose to be. Maybe when one of the little Dreamers moves on they are to take a little part of our heart with them. It is these types of experiences that make you take advantage of the time that you have with them because you never know when you will receive the phone call that they are going. I miss them already and thank God that I was able to know them while they were in our care.

DaRonn

A Good Bye

Whether it be a close friend, co-worker or family member, for most, good-byes can be pretty rough.

Today at the House of Dreams was a day that we all dread, yet look forward to.

Today, we said good-bye to sisters Marta Sylvia and Melisa Vilma as they went back to live with some of their family.

They came into the home last year, just a few days after I arrived for a visit.  I can remember seeing their faces for the first time.  I remember admiring them and taking notes on  how quickly they adapted to their new environment.  It seems like it was just yesterday.

Since the day they have arrived they have been nothing but a joy to have around.  Tough as nails with smiles that could melt the hardest of hearts, these are two of the sweetest little girls you could ever meet.

Pray for them and their family as they get acclimated with             living together.

Pray for the House of Dreams workers/volunteers/Dreamers,           as we adjust to life without these two.

Pray for their futures, that they may grow into strong young          women and make an impact on the world around them.

Romon

Renewal

1, 5, 3, 7, 10!

C’mon, think hard back to those elementary years when you learned to say the first ten numbers in Spanish. Now go back and read those numbers as if a lispy preschooler was showing off his counting skills. That is what I came into during table time one morning at the House of Dreams. So precious to watch the kids’ eyes light up when they want to show you what they have learned.

Numbers follow us for the rest of our lives don’t they? Numbers and I have tousled over the years. Even though we don’t always get long that well we have learned how to put up with each other. Numbers are important. Numbers keep us accountable.

“The numbers mean faces. The faces mean lives changed. The change is eternal.”

This is a paraphrased quote from a fellow missionary here in Bolivia. Even when I am on the outs with certain numbers I can trust that they do not lie. On days when the numbers are in my favor they truly excite me. Some days they are the one thing what keeps me going.

Due to a number of factors we are in the process of renewing our license as a legal orphanage in Bolivia. They are asking us for a projection of the nature of our operations for the next five years. We are including in the documentation now our capacity for caring for older children so that as the kids grow they do not have to be moved to a different home. The reasoning is based mainly on our desire to do right by the Life-Time Dreamers**.

Our director just handed me a report on the progress with the renewal of the license which included some numbers. Enjoy!

Children moved out of the House of Dreams

#	Category	Quantity	Percentage
1	Reinsertion with family	21	66%
2	Guardianship with the intent to adopt	2	6%
3	Transfer to other orphanage	1	3%
4	Adoptions 2008	1	3%
5	Adoptions 2009	6	19%
6	Adoptions 2010	1	3%
TOTALS		32	100%

Situations from which the children currently living at the House of Dreams were removed

#	Type	Quantity	Percent
1	Dangerous situation	6	30%
2	Child trafficking	1	5%
3	Abandonment	7	35%
4	Parental negligence	4	20%
5	Abuse	1	5%
6	Missing or lost	1	5%
TOTALS		20	100%

Current step in the legal process for the children who reside at the House of Dreams

#	Step	Quantity	Percent
1	Inexistence of affiliation * No fit family members can be found to assume the responsibility of the child.	5	25%
2	Termination of Authority * Guardianship has been revoked.	3	15%
3	Eventual Reinsertion with family A family member will be assuming guardianship of the child after legal measures are taken.	3	15%
4	To be determined	9	45%
TOTALS		20	100%

*The child is a candidate to be adopted.

We are so grateful to have played a part in finding homes for 32 children. We are also extremely thankful for the 20 children who call the House of Dreams home.

Jose playing with some toys

Angie

**To understand the term Life-Time Dreamers you can look at two key posts: “Life-Time Dreamers” and “Growing a Family“

The Day of the Child

A beautiful tradition in the Bolivian culture is the celebration of The Day of the Child (El Día del Niño). Simple presents are given to the kids, a family might have a small party at their house or go on an outting, and there are always fun cakes and candies served. We also had a bit of a party at the House of Dreams. By the end of the festivities the kids were turning away the cupcakes and jello because we had successfully stuffed their round little bellies full as they could be.

As an extra special highlight to the day Mayra and her mother are finally reunited as a family. The legal requirements have been fulfilled so the mother was able to take her home today. Mayra was wide-eyed and just taking it all in after we all prayed over them and gave them hugs good-bye. The mother has visited the orphanage  once or twice a week for the almost three years that Mayra was with us. She could hardly wait to get Mayra’s things packed and go. It was a sweet time. We are happy for them.

Following are some fun pics from the day and a video to give you a glimpse at our precious kids on this happy occasion.

Cristina, our director, Mayra and her mother

Gathering around for hugs

Big hugs from Jhoselyn

Jose playing with some toys

- Angie

Mayra has a Mother

This weekend our dear little Mayra will be returning to her mother’s loving care. It has been a long road, but worthwhile. Mayra came to us a few months after we started the House of Dreams. She was a timid 4 year old at the time. Now she is an outgoing and content 7 year old. Her mother has visited her regularly and helps with all the kids whenever she is with us. There have been many requirements she has had to meet in order to prove to the authorities that her home is adequate for a child. It has been good to see the change. We are happy for Mayra and this new chapter of her life.

- Angie

Growing a Family

Due to the recent decision to focus on the futures of the current children we have made some plans. Following you will see a set of priorities. The focus of energy to do the paperwork to get these 10 children adoption-ready will progress in sets. These four groupings represent about a year to 18 months of proceedings all together.

Priority #1 – the babies

1. Bridgit

2. Alicia

3. Vladimir

Priority #2 – the kids

*1. Carolina

*2. Shirley

*3. Fernando

Priority #3 – special needs

1. Isaura

*2. Gabriel

Priority #4 – re-insertions

(Currently in process to return to their families in the coming months. Effort on our part is minimal.)

1. Mayra

2. Roberto

*The asterisk indicates children with a higher probability of not getting adopted due to their age. These children may enter the list of Lifetime Dreamers.

Lifetime Dreamers are kids in sibling sets, have special needs or are older. Technically they are adoption-ready and on the list in the courts to be matched with a family. Although, it is most likely that we will be their family. This has led us to an exciting new decision.

The Lifetime Dreamers:

1. Estefani

2. Emilin

3. Jhoselyn

4. Jose Luis

5. Anne

6. Jose

7. Joel

8. Marta Sylvia

9. Melisa Vilma

10. Bernancio

11. Yamil

Now comes the exciting decision. We are looking for a home big enough to house the Washingtons and the Lifetime Dreamers. We have already started picturing what the house will be like. We will still have a staff and volunteers. Groups will still come to visit. The Dream Makers will still help us. The big change is that it will be more of a home and not so much a temporary waiting place.

The main goal is to treat these kids as though they are our own. So in the coming year or so DaRonn and I will be parenting about 16 kids.

You can pray as we focus on these changes:

• That the kids who God would have to be adopted would have smooth and speedy processing.
• That we are directed by the Lord as we go about changing the dynamics of the home.
• That we would have wise advisors.

Thanks!

- Angie